Pillow-Talk

I woke up this morning feeling great. I'm not quite sure why but I won't analyze it. My x-boyfriend Andy passed by yesterday night. It was interesting to see him. He's losing a lot of weight and that's great for him. He's with some girl from Massachusetts. He used to complain about the drive from Hoboken, NJ to Brooklyn. Now he's driving from Jersey to Springfield, MA?! LOL. People do crazy things in the name of love man, don't I know it.


I sometimes look back at the decisions I've made and reconsider how I went about things and if I could do it again how I would've done it differently. I'm sorry I hurt you*. That's all I can say. I didn't know what to do. How do you tell someone who loves you more than anyone has ever loved you that you don't feel the same. It's impossible.

I've been talking to someone from my past again. I don't know what to think of it. I just don't know...

Dilan is great. There's just something about him.

Anyway, I'm off to start my day.

Never meant to cause you no pain ; but it looks like I did it again

Exactly how I feel.



Phil Collins _ I wish it would rain down

You know I never meant to see you again
and I only passed by as a friend
All this time I stayed out of sight
I started wondering why

Now I, I wish it would rain down, down on me
Yes I wish it would rain, rain down on me now
Oh, I wish it would rain down, down on me
Oh, Yes I wish it would rain, rain down on me

You said you didn't need me in your life
Oh, I guess you were right, Yeh
Oh, I never meant to cause you no pain
But it looks like I did it again

Now I, I wish it would rain down, down on me
Yes I wish it would rain, rain down on me now
Oh, I wish it would rain down, down on me
Oh, Yes I wish it would rain, rain down on me

Though your hurt is gone, mines hanging on, inside
And I know it's eating me through every night and day
I'm just waiting on your sign

'Cos I know, I know I never meant to cause you no pain
And I realize I let you down
But I know in my heart of hearts
I know I'm never gonna hold you again

Now I, I wish it would rain down, down on me
Yes I wish it would rain, rain down on me now
Oh, I wish it would rain down, down on me
Yes I wish it would rain, rain down on me

Just rain down on me, Just let it rain down
Let it rain down, Let it rain down, Oh Yeh
Let it rain down, Rain down on me,
Just let it rain down, Just let it rain down,
Let it rain down, Just let it rain ...

I'm Sick & Tired

what the fuck?

Why do people assume I'm talking about them; when I'm really not. My last Blog entry "Some bitches never learn" was directed to my friend Patricia. She knows it and I know it.

If I have nothing to say to you then that is exactly what I do. I say nothing to you.

-shrugs-

Anyway;



"It's the schemers that put you where you are. You were a schemer, you had plans, and uh, look where that got you. I just did what I do best. I took your plan and I turned it on itself."

I do whats best for me, I always worried about how everyone else would perceive me but I was born alone & I'm dying alone, unless of course Roxanne & I do that Dare Devil bungee shit again at Six Flags Great Adventure and plummet to our death.

the pain ive endured.

Every so often I come across his picture; our pictures & I can't even cry. Its an emptiness i feel. It's almost like my whole body becomes weak from my legs to my fingertips. I think about the times I was actually happy with him, then i recall the pain I've endured being with him. He never really loved me and I'm convinced of that. For a year I spent my life idolizing him. I was in love with the way he spoke to me. He made me feel good. But all that makes you feel good isn't really good for you. I learned that the hard way. I literally left everything I knew for him. I see his private Myspace page every so often. I know he's with her now; who knows if they're happy. I laugh thinking that maybe he'll treat her the same. She's quite shady herself for pretending to be a friend. I'm still waiting for the day that we cross paths; God is my witness ma it won't be pretty. I shouldnt care; and I dont think this is me caring but growing from it. I know now better than I did before what I'm worth. Never will I lose myself in finding someone else.

Thank you for showing me that I'm better off without you.

btw im happily taken by a man who deserves me.

home sweet borough

Is that Viva La Cool? Yea; Toby Grimm is my nigga.

Dedication

Happy 21st Birthday to my dearest friend Mayra Minette Perez. Now that we are both 21; how about this weekend we hit up Angels & Kings? I'm just saying let's get you Liquored up and make some bad decisions.

TPain ft Teddy Verseti -- Church

Be Serious; It's Not That Serious.

Suddenly everyone has a blog. I dont have a problem with that. Do what you will with your time. The thing thats bothering me is....Everyone is taking shit too seriously.

I read peoples blogs & their entries & they just try way too hard. Babies its blogspot; you are not getting paid. You are not going to get discovered for your opinions on relationships because guess what....nobody gives a damn.

I do this because it kills time; & its fun.

So stop taking yourself so damn seriously. You are 17-19; you drink starbucks; smoke ciggarettes; & portray yourself as such an unique individual on the internet.

GET THE FUCK OVER YOURSELVES. Drink a capri sun; play uno; go jogging. Something.

Some Bitches Never Learn

As God is my witness; I will never advise another chick. I'm not going to go in detail but I try to warn a girl about a nigga that I KNOW FOR A FACT HE TAKES NOT A 1 BITCH SERIOUSLY. & What does she do? Wipe her ass with my words. I dont say shit to people so when I do actually have input; its for a reason. If he plays her like I know he will I guarantee tears. Well Cry Shorty because Those waterworks could have been prevented. -shrugs-

I can post a list of niggas I know that arent boyfriend material.

ANYWAY

My day is pretty slow.

I chilled with lenny the other night, OH how i miss that shunuvabish.

Here are some pictures...






I'll update later

eight13dub?

what the fuck?

Jockin' Jay-Z

Oh my fucking God! Can we say Jazo just wet herself. I dont know how to explain the feeling I got when I heard this. Hov baby you making me proud.



btw.

I'm going to see Pineapple Express tomorrow; &
Sunday I'm going to have a picnic w| my long lost love Patty Mayonaise :]

Some Shit.

I want to go to florida before august is over; im determined.


Umm yea Im returning to college; everyone is happy about that.

I want to go to cheeburger cheeburger tonight.


Some People I want to see this weekend: Natalyyyyyy; Patriciaaa; & [your name here]